Sarah, I love this so much! Whenever I’m hiking, especially with a heavy pack on my back, I always get irritated at the entitlement and air of superiority exuded by passing runners. Really makes ya think, huh? I’ve since gone out of my way to smile and thank hikers who move aside, or even to stop for THEM.
As you know, my kids used to hate running but now they love it and are outrunning me. Your post made me wonder why that is, compared to your family’s opposite reaction. I think you put your finger on it. Even as I’ve raced a LOT over the years, I’ve never been as accomplished as you at it, or as serious. I’ve never altered my diet, I’ve been spotty at best with things like strength training, but more than all of that I think I never projected a sense that I was any good at it … it was just something I liked to do, and even though it took up a lot of my time it was always secondary to things like my job. The kids never thought I was anything special as a runner, so they were never intimidated about trying to run with me. And when they got old enough to want to join me, I’d slowed down so much that they had no trouble keeping up.😅 So, I guess your post made me realize the bright side of being mediocre at running! 😂
I love that you and Morgan did this hike, and now I really want to do it with Chris. I’ve convinced him to try some short backpacking trips with me next summer - he really wants to do Mount Whitney, which is something you guys might enjoy too! Hit me up if that sounds interesting and you want details.
Check out my reply to Cara re planning a GC outing next year given the long-term construction project; might be worth waiting til 2026 unless it’s mostly done by May.
I’m so happy your girls turned out the way they did!
Oh Sarah. Another extremely timely and insightful essay from you! As you know, my daughter and I just visited the GC two weeks ago. It was HER idea to include me on her vacation to the GC before she traveled to Sedona solo (and her first visit to the GC). In the weeks leading up to our trip, we did a test hike on a mountain road near my house to check her knees/back (she's a spin cycle instructor and former lacrosse player with a history of IT band issues and sciatica). She had some significant pain after this hike in her back, which told us that the best hike for us would be down South Kaibab to Cedar Point (1.5 miles) and back up. It was perfect. We also took a pic of the sunrise right next to the spot where your pic of you and Morgan is :-)
When we got to the rim, she tried running and for the next 4 miles we did an easy run/hike on the rim trail back to the El Tovar (where breakfast was waiting!). Later that day we took the shuttle west to Hopi Point and walked back on the rim trail to the car at Bright Angel TH. Overall, a wonderful way to share the GC with my daughter (who I also coached in high school on the lacrosse team -- so I'm acutely aware of the parent/coach dynamic and what NOT to do or say to make it not fun).
I have to say that I've now experience the GC in three very different -- and equally gratifying-- ways: R2R2R in 2005 (running); down to PR via SK/Tonto West (isn't Tonto a fantastic trail?!)/BA and three nights staying at PR with a BA ascent back up on day 3 (all hiking with a run on the Clear Creek Trail on day 2); and now the South Rim trail (run/hike). I also tell you every chance I get that your essay on your hike on the Routeburn Track in NZ with Morgan was the impetus for me to organize our own Routeburn Hike in 2018 -- because you were so specific about the details -- how to shuttle the car, how fast to hike ("only 2 miles an hour!") and all the little things that gave me confidence that Virginia, Rusty and I could do it (and we did!). It remains one of the most incredible family experiences of my life. We would not have attempted it without your experience and words of wisdom. So, thank you, friend. And thank you for putting in words what I've often said and done and felt as a runner who wants to share the trails with my family. Slowing down is always right. XO
Sophie, this gives me all the feels! Now you & I need to do a special daylong outing together. I'll never forget our Marin Headlands big run with Clare.
Sarah, I am not sure why but this was one of my favorite posts of yours, loved it. I guess I can relate to how my family feels about running and backpacking with me. Dave and I have been together since our later 20's so not as long as you two, but pretty long. Love that you did this together at a pace that is enjoyable for all and actually the pace you can best appreciate everything. I have wanted for years to do this or R2R with Max and Dave but as much as he is an adrenaline junkie on bike and skis, Dave's knees are probably not up for this downhill on foot. Ill have to wait until Max agrees. I am very interested in that Tonto cut over and maybe I'll try and do that Rim to river and back with a friend in the spring. Thanks for sharing!
If you plan this trip, keep an eye on the park's construction project and their notices about trail closures. I didn't mention, because it didn't really fit in the story, but the construction noise down by Phantom was a bummer, as was the helicopter noise (helicopters deliver the construction supplies). I do recommend May over October; the spring flowers I saw in May of 2023 were spectacular, and this time of year doesn't feature that blooming. If we can get a room at Phantom in the lottery, we might do North Rim > Phantom in May (13ish miles), spend the night, and hike back up to North Rim the following day. Or we could camp there overnight and hike with heavier packs for camping. It's fun to consider the possibilities!
Yes, thank you I have been following. That sounds like a great trip, Morgan should see the North Rim it is so beautiful and different. I love the whole north rim of the GC, I did an amazing but challenging backpack off of a more desolate trail a few years ago to see sites you usually only see on the river trip. It's so much quieter. The benefit of Rim to River is that is takes much less planning but I think I would also skip if there was that much noise, thank you for the reminder. A couple years ago 2 friends and I did R3 but with a quick layover at night on the North Rim in a Cabin around May 24th or so. We were there for maybe 10 hours. I actually loved that itinerary as it gave us more time to explore, lounge in all water sources and go to Ribbon Falls but still getting a great run and training in. I cannot wait until the day Max and I can do this together. All in all I am in love with that canyon, it is just magic. So happy you did that together, so many possibilities!
I love the pics and the recounting of your hike, it makes me want to plan my own GC adventure! I can really relate to everything you said about your relationship with your family, partner, and running. I also have to force myself to get out of training mode and have a vacation that my partner and I can both enjoy, and spend normal time together instead of me being focused on needing to get in my long run or strength workout. My partner and I have always had hiking and the outdoors as a shared love, but as I got into the longer distances I experienced a lot of what you mentioned. Many years ago we started running together, but I got serious about it pretty quickly and she was happy to run short distances every now and then, and doesn't run much anymore. She is cautious about my route planning, and I am sad that I don't get to share all of the trails I love with her. I struggle with the line between getting her out of her comfort zone so she can have a great experience, and pushing too much to the point of making something not fun for her. It gives me inspiration to read about your hike here and how it all worked out.
Well wouldn't you know it!!? I was down there too last weekend!!
I had never been to the bottom of the Grand Canyon, so I managed to book 2 nights at Bright Angel campground on Sun and Mon.
I went with 3 girl friends - one hiking partner and one kind soul who did the shuttle for us (she was originally going to hike but has been having knee problems)
Originally I wanted to do rim to rim in a day but couldn't find anyone to join me on that adventure! So we spent two nights camping at the bottom and I'm so glad we did it that way! The in between day was just wonderful ! - very relaxing and allowed us to really appreciate being immersed in such a phenomenal natural wonder.
And in relation to your experience of underestimating mileage : Andrea and I set off down the North rim thinking it was 14 miles to the campground , only to realize it was a bit longer!! It was actually 17.5 miles! we spent 3 miles rounding bend after bend in the canyon expecting to see Phantom Ranch!
But what a great experience! I hope to go back and explore some of the lesser travelled trails.
So glad you got to experience that with your husband, I couldn't persuade mine to do it for love nor money!!
I love this and can totally relate. I have been guilty of pushing on family rides etc. Bringing along lots of snacks helps but the reality is I still sometimes have the urge to “push’” in many areas of life where others in my family don’t. I am both annoyed sometimes that they don’t push AND appreciate intellectually that it is often better for someone if one doesn’t have this trait.
Life feels like a lifelong journey to calm the F down for me and sometimes that is harder than other times. I feel like you are teaching me ways to do it gracefully!!
This was such a timely and insightful piece. Thank you for sharing. As a long time hiker and new runner whose partner doesn't find the running exciting I'm working to find the balance for our time outside together. I underestimated how much harder it would be slow down to a rambling pace after figuring out how much fun going faster can be.
“I needed to let go of any thoughts of running or training during our time together. Don’t shoehorn in a run after our long drive Friday, don’t do pushups on the hotel floor.”
That hits very, very close to home. Took me many years to learn that an hour with family and friends is far more important than another 5-miler down the sidewalk or, yes, some improvised strength session in a hotel room.
This made me think about a trip my now-husband and I took a few years ago to Bryce National Park, along with two runner friends of mine. My husband is definitely not a runner but loves to hike. We did this insanely beautiful 8 mile loop - me and my friends running and my husband hiking. He jokingly gives me a hard time about how I 'abandoned' him on the greatest hike of all time....but I actually really regret leaving him that day! I think about it a lot when trying to prioritize how much time to actually put into running/training. It can be tricky to balance!
Loved this. I’ve had similar experiences guiding my sisters across the Grand Canyon. Our first year, in 2022, I herranged them about their training and preparation for months, carried a 50-liter pack loaded with a bunch of supplies and 15 pounds of ice in an insulated bag (this is before I knew they sold bags of ice at Phantom Ranch), and struggled with managing all of the issues that came up during the hike. But incredibly my sisters fell in love with the trek and by this year, they’re old pros.
We have a rhythm and a number of stops we like to make, so the R2R has taken between 14 and 15 hours each time. My sister Lisa was upset about that this year, because she felt she should be faster by now. I assured her that speed doesn’t matter at all. It really doesn’t. Although I’ve never run R2R, I once hiked with my dad in under 8 hours and that was a fairly forgettable year. This route is so special and it’s not an easy place to get to. It’s worth stopping to look and taking our time.
My sisters learned to hate hiking while we were growing up and our dad pushed us on some grueling treks (which I, of course, loved because that’s just my personality type.) I’m so grateful they finally took the leap, because now it’s something we can share.
I really enjoyed this post and my family are similarly not as enthused about the trails as me. I’m going to share this with my husband with an apology for all the times I’ve made him join me “walking with a bag” - his name for hiking
Sarah, I really enjoyed this newsletter. Happy you and Morgan had a great hike. It made me think about a similar experience. Sally and I were in Yosemite last month with a group. We decided to break away from the group for a day to do a more strenuous hike to see a couple waterfalls. I let her control the pace and helped her at a few spots (large step ups or downs) to protect her knees. We had a wonderful time and it is one of the highlights of our time in Yosemite.
Hey Sarah! So happy I stumbled upon your newsletter - you and your husband are very inspiring to me, as an avid hiker and trail runner myself. I thoroughly enjoyed distracting myself with your words and flow ;) I also love the bit about your husband's "insurance policy" at the beginning; happy to hear he didn't need to end up filing a claim! Your story was engaging and super relevant to my life as a Type II Fun gal, who sometimes struggles to find ways to make "adventuring" a little more accessible to family members and friends who automatically deem what I do unsafe, unfun, or unachievable.
Sarah, I love this so much! Whenever I’m hiking, especially with a heavy pack on my back, I always get irritated at the entitlement and air of superiority exuded by passing runners. Really makes ya think, huh? I’ve since gone out of my way to smile and thank hikers who move aside, or even to stop for THEM.
As you know, my kids used to hate running but now they love it and are outrunning me. Your post made me wonder why that is, compared to your family’s opposite reaction. I think you put your finger on it. Even as I’ve raced a LOT over the years, I’ve never been as accomplished as you at it, or as serious. I’ve never altered my diet, I’ve been spotty at best with things like strength training, but more than all of that I think I never projected a sense that I was any good at it … it was just something I liked to do, and even though it took up a lot of my time it was always secondary to things like my job. The kids never thought I was anything special as a runner, so they were never intimidated about trying to run with me. And when they got old enough to want to join me, I’d slowed down so much that they had no trouble keeping up.😅 So, I guess your post made me realize the bright side of being mediocre at running! 😂
I love that you and Morgan did this hike, and now I really want to do it with Chris. I’ve convinced him to try some short backpacking trips with me next summer - he really wants to do Mount Whitney, which is something you guys might enjoy too! Hit me up if that sounds interesting and you want details.
Hahaha and I love your insights!
Check out my reply to Cara re planning a GC outing next year given the long-term construction project; might be worth waiting til 2026 unless it’s mostly done by May.
I’m so happy your girls turned out the way they did!
Oh Sarah. Another extremely timely and insightful essay from you! As you know, my daughter and I just visited the GC two weeks ago. It was HER idea to include me on her vacation to the GC before she traveled to Sedona solo (and her first visit to the GC). In the weeks leading up to our trip, we did a test hike on a mountain road near my house to check her knees/back (she's a spin cycle instructor and former lacrosse player with a history of IT band issues and sciatica). She had some significant pain after this hike in her back, which told us that the best hike for us would be down South Kaibab to Cedar Point (1.5 miles) and back up. It was perfect. We also took a pic of the sunrise right next to the spot where your pic of you and Morgan is :-)
When we got to the rim, she tried running and for the next 4 miles we did an easy run/hike on the rim trail back to the El Tovar (where breakfast was waiting!). Later that day we took the shuttle west to Hopi Point and walked back on the rim trail to the car at Bright Angel TH. Overall, a wonderful way to share the GC with my daughter (who I also coached in high school on the lacrosse team -- so I'm acutely aware of the parent/coach dynamic and what NOT to do or say to make it not fun).
I have to say that I've now experience the GC in three very different -- and equally gratifying-- ways: R2R2R in 2005 (running); down to PR via SK/Tonto West (isn't Tonto a fantastic trail?!)/BA and three nights staying at PR with a BA ascent back up on day 3 (all hiking with a run on the Clear Creek Trail on day 2); and now the South Rim trail (run/hike). I also tell you every chance I get that your essay on your hike on the Routeburn Track in NZ with Morgan was the impetus for me to organize our own Routeburn Hike in 2018 -- because you were so specific about the details -- how to shuttle the car, how fast to hike ("only 2 miles an hour!") and all the little things that gave me confidence that Virginia, Rusty and I could do it (and we did!). It remains one of the most incredible family experiences of my life. We would not have attempted it without your experience and words of wisdom. So, thank you, friend. And thank you for putting in words what I've often said and done and felt as a runner who wants to share the trails with my family. Slowing down is always right. XO
Sophie, this gives me all the feels! Now you & I need to do a special daylong outing together. I'll never forget our Marin Headlands big run with Clare.
Sarah, I am not sure why but this was one of my favorite posts of yours, loved it. I guess I can relate to how my family feels about running and backpacking with me. Dave and I have been together since our later 20's so not as long as you two, but pretty long. Love that you did this together at a pace that is enjoyable for all and actually the pace you can best appreciate everything. I have wanted for years to do this or R2R with Max and Dave but as much as he is an adrenaline junkie on bike and skis, Dave's knees are probably not up for this downhill on foot. Ill have to wait until Max agrees. I am very interested in that Tonto cut over and maybe I'll try and do that Rim to river and back with a friend in the spring. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you! That means a lot.
If you plan this trip, keep an eye on the park's construction project and their notices about trail closures. I didn't mention, because it didn't really fit in the story, but the construction noise down by Phantom was a bummer, as was the helicopter noise (helicopters deliver the construction supplies). I do recommend May over October; the spring flowers I saw in May of 2023 were spectacular, and this time of year doesn't feature that blooming. If we can get a room at Phantom in the lottery, we might do North Rim > Phantom in May (13ish miles), spend the night, and hike back up to North Rim the following day. Or we could camp there overnight and hike with heavier packs for camping. It's fun to consider the possibilities!
Yes, thank you I have been following. That sounds like a great trip, Morgan should see the North Rim it is so beautiful and different. I love the whole north rim of the GC, I did an amazing but challenging backpack off of a more desolate trail a few years ago to see sites you usually only see on the river trip. It's so much quieter. The benefit of Rim to River is that is takes much less planning but I think I would also skip if there was that much noise, thank you for the reminder. A couple years ago 2 friends and I did R3 but with a quick layover at night on the North Rim in a Cabin around May 24th or so. We were there for maybe 10 hours. I actually loved that itinerary as it gave us more time to explore, lounge in all water sources and go to Ribbon Falls but still getting a great run and training in. I cannot wait until the day Max and I can do this together. All in all I am in love with that canyon, it is just magic. So happy you did that together, so many possibilities!
What a beautiful post and a great reminder
I love the pics and the recounting of your hike, it makes me want to plan my own GC adventure! I can really relate to everything you said about your relationship with your family, partner, and running. I also have to force myself to get out of training mode and have a vacation that my partner and I can both enjoy, and spend normal time together instead of me being focused on needing to get in my long run or strength workout. My partner and I have always had hiking and the outdoors as a shared love, but as I got into the longer distances I experienced a lot of what you mentioned. Many years ago we started running together, but I got serious about it pretty quickly and she was happy to run short distances every now and then, and doesn't run much anymore. She is cautious about my route planning, and I am sad that I don't get to share all of the trails I love with her. I struggle with the line between getting her out of her comfort zone so she can have a great experience, and pushing too much to the point of making something not fun for her. It gives me inspiration to read about your hike here and how it all worked out.
Thanks for reading & relating. I hear ya! good luck
Well wouldn't you know it!!? I was down there too last weekend!!
I had never been to the bottom of the Grand Canyon, so I managed to book 2 nights at Bright Angel campground on Sun and Mon.
I went with 3 girl friends - one hiking partner and one kind soul who did the shuttle for us (she was originally going to hike but has been having knee problems)
Originally I wanted to do rim to rim in a day but couldn't find anyone to join me on that adventure! So we spent two nights camping at the bottom and I'm so glad we did it that way! The in between day was just wonderful ! - very relaxing and allowed us to really appreciate being immersed in such a phenomenal natural wonder.
And in relation to your experience of underestimating mileage : Andrea and I set off down the North rim thinking it was 14 miles to the campground , only to realize it was a bit longer!! It was actually 17.5 miles! we spent 3 miles rounding bend after bend in the canyon expecting to see Phantom Ranch!
But what a great experience! I hope to go back and explore some of the lesser travelled trails.
So glad you got to experience that with your husband, I couldn't persuade mine to do it for love nor money!!
And again, thanks for the blog. A great read x
Jane.
I love this and can totally relate. I have been guilty of pushing on family rides etc. Bringing along lots of snacks helps but the reality is I still sometimes have the urge to “push’” in many areas of life where others in my family don’t. I am both annoyed sometimes that they don’t push AND appreciate intellectually that it is often better for someone if one doesn’t have this trait.
Life feels like a lifelong journey to calm the F down for me and sometimes that is harder than other times. I feel like you are teaching me ways to do it gracefully!!
I'm still trying to CTFD! Thanks so much for reading and relating.
This was such a timely and insightful piece. Thank you for sharing. As a long time hiker and new runner whose partner doesn't find the running exciting I'm working to find the balance for our time outside together. I underestimated how much harder it would be slow down to a rambling pace after figuring out how much fun going faster can be.
“I needed to let go of any thoughts of running or training during our time together. Don’t shoehorn in a run after our long drive Friday, don’t do pushups on the hotel floor.”
That hits very, very close to home. Took me many years to learn that an hour with family and friends is far more important than another 5-miler down the sidewalk or, yes, some improvised strength session in a hotel room.
This made me think about a trip my now-husband and I took a few years ago to Bryce National Park, along with two runner friends of mine. My husband is definitely not a runner but loves to hike. We did this insanely beautiful 8 mile loop - me and my friends running and my husband hiking. He jokingly gives me a hard time about how I 'abandoned' him on the greatest hike of all time....but I actually really regret leaving him that day! I think about it a lot when trying to prioritize how much time to actually put into running/training. It can be tricky to balance!
Maybe you and he can do a do-over :-)
I loved reading this.
Loved this. I’ve had similar experiences guiding my sisters across the Grand Canyon. Our first year, in 2022, I herranged them about their training and preparation for months, carried a 50-liter pack loaded with a bunch of supplies and 15 pounds of ice in an insulated bag (this is before I knew they sold bags of ice at Phantom Ranch), and struggled with managing all of the issues that came up during the hike. But incredibly my sisters fell in love with the trek and by this year, they’re old pros.
We have a rhythm and a number of stops we like to make, so the R2R has taken between 14 and 15 hours each time. My sister Lisa was upset about that this year, because she felt she should be faster by now. I assured her that speed doesn’t matter at all. It really doesn’t. Although I’ve never run R2R, I once hiked with my dad in under 8 hours and that was a fairly forgettable year. This route is so special and it’s not an easy place to get to. It’s worth stopping to look and taking our time.
My sisters learned to hate hiking while we were growing up and our dad pushed us on some grueling treks (which I, of course, loved because that’s just my personality type.) I’m so grateful they finally took the leap, because now it’s something we can share.
I really enjoyed your recent post on doing the R2R with your sisters! Thankfully, the weather was not so hot for us.
I really enjoyed this post and my family are similarly not as enthused about the trails as me. I’m going to share this with my husband with an apology for all the times I’ve made him join me “walking with a bag” - his name for hiking
Great essay! The Tonto Trail looks like my kind of trail.
Sarah, I really enjoyed this newsletter. Happy you and Morgan had a great hike. It made me think about a similar experience. Sally and I were in Yosemite last month with a group. We decided to break away from the group for a day to do a more strenuous hike to see a couple waterfalls. I let her control the pace and helped her at a few spots (large step ups or downs) to protect her knees. We had a wonderful time and it is one of the highlights of our time in Yosemite.
Thank you Dave! That’s great to hear.
Hey Sarah! So happy I stumbled upon your newsletter - you and your husband are very inspiring to me, as an avid hiker and trail runner myself. I thoroughly enjoyed distracting myself with your words and flow ;) I also love the bit about your husband's "insurance policy" at the beginning; happy to hear he didn't need to end up filing a claim! Your story was engaging and super relevant to my life as a Type II Fun gal, who sometimes struggles to find ways to make "adventuring" a little more accessible to family members and friends who automatically deem what I do unsafe, unfun, or unachievable.